Growing to love beer

My dog is so lovely.

In my dreams I am coordinated enough to punch a happy couple in the face

I'm tired of giving. It would feel so good to break something. 

"Usually, we walk around constantly believing ourselves. "I'm ok," we say. "I'm all right." But sometimes the truth arrives on you, and you can't get it off. That's when you realize that sometimes it isn't even an answer-it's a question. Even now, I wonder how much of my life is convinced. "

Funny how the same things I was writing about two years ago still ring true. For a so-called "scientist", I am very good at skewing the facts into the truth that I want. At some point I know I will have to come to terms with the way things really are. In the meantime, I just have to hope that nobody else can foresee this, and won't judge me too harshly when I fail.

Stopped flinching at the c word

Time is going by so fast.

On Saturday, something nice happened at Milestone's. An old British lady came in to eat by herself, and Hayley sat her at 42, the booth closest the front door. This is the booth that is difficult/nearly impossible to seat. The nicest people will fucking BITE your head off if you try to seat them there...I don't even see why, there's no draft. Maybe it has to do with some animal instinct of not wanting to be so exposed while eating. Vulnerable. Anyways this lady happily sat there, quietly eating her eggs benedict. When she got up to pay, the server said that someone else had taken care of her bill (a man who said she reminded him of his mother) and the old woman was so surprised and happy, she said it was "extraordinary because today is my seventy-third birthday". It was nice to see.

In other news, I may have failed my English midterm. My head is filled with thoughts thoughts thoughts. They aren't attached to emotions. I don't feel what I should. I hate being anything other than idle.